instructions

   this is your conspiracy theory. mutter it in bars, scream it on street corners, keep it to yourself for fear of reprisals from the Venusian commander-in-chief, do what you want with it. good luck.

   please note: we can't guarantee a coherent theory. it may even be self-contradictory. this hasn't mattered to generations of conspiracy theorists, why should it matter to you?

theory

   "Why can't anyone see that Osama bin Laden is being mind conrolled by the Venusian commander-in-chief? It's all so that the Venusian envoy, hidden in a secret HQ near the Everglades can enslave the Human Race. After that, the Venusian commander-in-chief will subvert the justice system for evil purposes when the disorder caused by the Venusian envoy reaches a peak. The only thing we can do is let the Spice Girls put together a militia to stop them. "

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